First I apologize for the delay in the final article, however the deadline day was January 23rd, the same day I was flying out across the ocean, and I didn’t have much time while I was in the UK to write this.
So when I last wrote, on January 17th 2009, I really didn’t sound very confident. And hell, why would I? I had 5 games left to beat, and in the previous 8 days I had played exactly zero minutes of XBox. No, things weren’t looking good at all, and I had actually given up on the challenge as I wrote that article. It was a defeatist attitude but an honest one – there was just no way I could beat the list of games in that length of time. It would involved beating the likes of Call of Duty 2 on Hardened, as well as COD 2 & 4 various levels on Veteran. Yeah – it was a bust.
Unless I could somehow – somehow, challenge John Cena and overcome the odds. But that didn’t seem likely. As I penned that article and posted it, I decided to sit back and think about the previous year, and the various games I played.
I remembered Cars, and how difficult it was. I remember struggling at that motherfucking game so bad, but so angry over it that I didn’t just beat it – I suffered through a few extra hours of hell just to get 1000 in it.
Then there was the memory of Blitz: The League where I had to win the final game in the season to get over 500, and it took me over 3 hours against that cheating motherfucking computer.
Don’t even get me started on the godawful King Kong.
There was a lot of bad memories, but also a lot of good memories. Picking up NHL 2K6, playing for 5 minutes and hitting 750 gamerscore points for example.
Or getting over the 500 mark in NBA 2K8, by beating Guapo online.
Then there was Stuntman: Ignition, one of the most difficult games I’ve played, but one which felt so fucking rewarding when I managed to get over the 500 mark.
There were many bad memories, but there were also many great memories.
As I sat back and thought about all this….
…I decided to go out in a blaze of glory.
Would I beat the challenge? Most likely not, but I was going to go down fighting, and give it one last go, for the sake of all the little Scotsamaniacs out there. For the sake of my son Mason, who gets excited every time an achievement pops up on screen. And for the sake of myself, to give me some feeling of self-worth.
Let’s rock.
- Burnout Revenge (195)
- Call of Duty 2 (50)
- Call of Duty 4 (50)
- Ghost Recon: Advanced Warfighter (150)
- Tiger Woods 09 (180)
That’s the list of games which stood between me, and victory.
Burnout Revenge: Already wrote about this one awhile ago – me and Brando both agreed as we had spent over 40 hours on this each, we had got our moneys worth and could wipe it off the list.
1 down.
4 to go.
Tiger Woods 2009: Having not played this in months, I sat down on Saturday, January 17th and Sunday the 18th and got my golf on so to speak. I won a major(25g), sung 10 eagles(25g), won all 4 majors(50g), won the fedex cup(50g), posted a gamernet challenge of over 1250 points(20g), drove 400 yards(25g), got a hole in one(25g), finished a round of golf below par with irons(25g), sank 5 double eagles(50g) and sank 200 birdies(25g).

2 down.
3 to go.
Ghost Recon Advanced Warfighter: I hate this game. Oh I hate it so much. It is the worst FPS I have played. Well maybe not – but it is fucking godawful. However I blasted through the game on easy mode, as well as did some things in multiplayer(4 kills in 4 seconds or less, and 30 kills without being killed), then played 6 levels in hard skill level(that was a bitch).

3 down.
2 to go.
Call of Duty 2: On the Tuesday, I began one of the most challenging parts of my achievement challenge yet – to go through this game on Hardened. This was absolutely fucking insane, and oh so goddamn difficult. I haven’t played much of the COD games – so this was an incredible challenge. I didn’t do it on Tuesday, and I ended up so burnt out from playing it all day I had to take Wednesday off from video games. Seriously, that’s how goddamn frustrating it was.
On Wednesday I woke up bright and early at 6am, and I sat there playing this game. I beat it on Hardened to take my score to 400 gamerscore points, then finished some missions on Veteran to take me to that precious score.

4 down.
1 to go.
But oh, how could I do it? This was the last day before I flew out, and I was expected to sit there and play COD 4? Worse, I was expected to play that after burning myself out on COD 2 for the last few days? Motherfucker.
But I persevered. The day before my birthday I sat there and I played the SHIT out of COD 4. In between running some errands before my trip, eating birthday cake, celebrating my birthday a day early and fucking my wife senseless, I played COD 4. I played it, I found the intel items, I completed all ghillied up without alerting any enemies, I shot down an enemy chopper with an RPG, and I marched my way through all the missions.
I beat the game, and sat there with exactly…………
410 gamerscore points.
Now let me paint you a picture. It was 5am, Friday morning. I had turned 28 just 5 hours prior. I had just beaten COD 4. I was absolutely exhausted, and I was leaving in a cab for a flight in exactly 1 hour and 30 minutes.
I COULD sit there and beat two missions on Veteran, as well as blow up all the TVs to put me above the 500…..
or I could not.
I sat there, thinking about things. I had came so far, but really – was the achievement challenge worth it? In the next 12 days I would be flying on like 10 different planes – there was a good chance I could die in a plane crash. Hell, I’d be spending time getting drunk off my ass in London – there was an even better chance I’d be mauled to death by a gang of chavs. Worse, I’d be spending 12 days without my family, who I would miss like crazy.
I could spend the next hour and a half playing a video game for 100 stupid gamerscore points.
Or I could go upstairs, take my kids into my bed, and cuddle with them and my wife, thinking about what is really important in life.
It really was no contest…..
I went up to bed.
You see – the point of this achievement challenge was to get my moneys worth out of my games. I’d did that, 500 gamerscore points or no 500 gamerscore points. For most games I’d gotten my moneys worth out of games and then some. I think of playing through COD 4 on single player, and all the online I played on it, and I really did get my moneys worth out of it.
If anything, I thought it’d be an awesome ending to come so close, yet just not manage to do it. It’d be like the ultimate failure, and one of those things that I’d get perverse enjoyment out of. Knowing that I had the ability to beat the challenge yet I chose not to.
Because really – video games are there for enjoyment. There are so many things more important than video games and stupid achievement points.
Like family.
So I went up to bed, and I brought the kids in to the bed I share with my wife. We all cuddled in, and I lay there, just smiling and happy. Some might consider me a loser – but cuddled in with my family, I knew that really – I had won, and they were the greatest prizes I could ever have.
Then I said “Who the fuck am I kidding?”, went downstairs and beat the challenge anyway.

Cuz I’m awesome like that.