The Quest: Minimum 500 gamerscore points in every game I own.

Welcome to this special early Sunday morning edition, as I’ll be away at Canadas Wonderland and the Toronto Zoo over the next two days.

Well after about a month of inactivity, I finally made some headway on the achievement challenge list this week, by adding not just one, but TWO games to the completed list.

Then I completely nullifed that by buying two new fucking games.  Sigh. [Continue...]

Written by robelgordo on 08/25/08

It may be a sports league cliché, but what a difference a week makes eh?

At the end of the first week it was the six GB&NI managers occupying the top six spots in the No Pants Provided League. Just one week on, and already their dominance is being eroded.

While Dirty Hun is still the leading manager, he is just now just five points ahead of Hamass. Despite being American and therefore rather ignorant to the ways of the EPL, his squad ‘It’s called Soccer, guys’ racked up a brilliant 134 points this week, moving seven places up the league ladder. Hamass explains the secret to his success in this week’s edition of A View From The Manager. His approach was rather straightforward, and considering THE FABULOUS PRIZES ON OFFER~!, I think well worth the effort.

The second most successful manager this week was Pete Moss, which further proves that it’s not all about the inside knowledge. He has moved up six places to fourth position, just behind the consistent Slappy (3rd in week one, 3rd in week two, 3rd overall) and ahead of the four other GB&NI managers.

Dr. Mort is also threatening the leaders, while after shocking opening rounds yours truly and Scotsman have both guided their teams to mid-table respectability.

At the relegation end, Kender’s Offenders were the worst performed squad in week two, and have moved into last overall. But there are still 36 weeks to go, and this round has demonstrated it only takes one to shake things up.

Player Results
Traditionally in fantasy leagues, defenders don’t accumulate as many points as players in other positions and so you don’t invest in them. But in this fantasy league that only seems half true.

Because the league is recording stats on interceptions, clearances and the like, defenders are actually proving to be the most useful players. However, it still plays not to invest in them, because their value in pounds seems to be no reflection on their true worth.

Take the best player after two weeks. It is Hull City’s Michael Turner with 47 points. Neither Hull nor Turner have ever played in the EPL before this season, and you could have picked up the most effective player in the fantasy league for a bargain basement $4m (in fact you still can!). The reason he is so effective is because Hull City aren’t, and so as a defender he’s very busy –nine interceptions and 29 clearances in two weeks.

In the top 12 defenders this season, there are another five worth less than Turner and just three worth more than $5m.

Just to further demonstrate that money isn’t everything, here is a comparison between the best performed and most expensive player in each position:

Goalkeeper – P Cech (Chelsea) 30pts/8.20m
Okay, bad start as Cech is both the best performed and most expensive ‘keeper

Defender – M Turner (Hull City) 47/4.00 vs R Ferdinand (Man Utd) 18/9.50
Turner is about 40% the price of Ferdinand, Ferdinand is about 40% the value of Turner

Defensive Midfielder – D Fletcher (Man Utd) 43/5.30 vs M Essien (Chelsea) 11/9.50
Admittedly Fletcher is 14pts clear of the next best DM and Essien has played just once

Midfielder – Deco (Chelsea) 37/8.00 vs C Ronaldo (Man Utd) 0/10.00
Okay, so Ronaldo is injured and Deco is still one of the more expensive players. But overall the best midfielders aren’t worth their price tag and there are some bargains down the list

Striker – G Agbonloahor (Aston Villa) 31/7.50 vs F Torres (Liverpool) 11/11.50
The Villa striker is actually the most expensive striker in the top 17

Other
There are only nine matches this weekend, as the Man Utd versus Fulham game has been postponed. Therefore, if you have players from either of those teams in your starting XI it would be a good idea to get them out.

Also this is the last weekend in August, so after this round transfers will reset at 5. This is good if you’ve used them all, and means if you haven’t and still aren’t happy with your team you should make some changes before the weekend.
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A View From A Manager

Manager : Hamass

Team : Its Called Soccer Guys

Seeing as how I catapulted from 9th to 2nd and am now only 5 points behind Hun, I figured I might as well give my two cents on the issue.

Going into this, I really only had one goal in mind: I like to receive things for free. Nothing in the world gives me greater joy than acquiring something I may or may not need without a cent coming out of my wallet. Thus, when signing up for Bender’s Fantasy Soccer contest, I knew I had to do a little bit of research in order to get that coveted EPL Jersey. Although I’m a douchebag so I’ll probably just get Manchester United or something. Lulz.

The first thing I did was randomize my team like Bender suggested, filling my lineup with a bunch of people I didn’t recognize. I was set to go forth with this lineup, when I realized I still had about $25 Million left to spare. This left a dilemma: I wanted to build the best team I possibly could, but I didn’t actually know a single player in the EPL, save Cristano Ronaldo (Perez Hilton thinks he’s dreamy).

So, I did what any USAmerican with 15 minutes to spare would do: I googled “best EPL players”. What I found was a list of several EPL players all considered as MVPs. I signed all of these players, depleting my budget quicky. With my remaining spots, I simply signed the cheapest players and went on with life.

However, coming in 9th (unacceptable!) one fact got in the way of my master plan: I didn’t know some of these guys were injured. So, I took out the injured guys and put in the people who performed the best week one.

Now, I’m ahead of Slappy, Cheekbone, Taff, Tucho, Bender, Scotsman, and even dear sweet Rachel. All the while mocking the backwards views of the ROTWeilers with my simple team name, “It’s called Soccer, guys”.

Hun, your reign at the top ends next week. That’s a promise. I’m the Michael Phelps of fantasy sports: ridiculously talented, kind of a douchebag, and most importantly, 100% American.

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If youd like to make any changes to your team you can at this link. And if youd like to write next week, or any future weeks for the “View from the Manager” then send Taff or robelgordo a PM.

Written by Shaft on August 27, 2008

It’s about time again for this year’s edition of the NPP NFL Pick ‘em. Will Viceroy be able to repeat after his 9 pick victory last year? Will the 2006 champion Kender return to glory after his 7th place finish last year? Or will Scotsman ban everyone after Week 16 so that only he can make his picks and win the competition? We’ll find out over the next seventeen weeks! [Continue...]

Written by CapnAndy on 08-25-08

GUITAR THRASH! CM Punk kicks off RAW with a match, apparently. I always like a promo to open RAW, but oh well. Cole and Lawler remind us about the Championship Scramble. I was trying to forget.
Bells ring, cows moo, and John “Seriously, what the fuck am I doing in the main event all the damn time, I’m worthless” Layfield enters the ring. A sign in the crowd informs us that CM PUNK PUT JBL TO SLEEP and another one suggests that JBL stands for JUST A BORN LOSER. I do not disagree with either sentiment.
MATCH TIME! Deafening “CM PUNK” chant starts us off. I’m bored just looking at JBL so instead I’m going to talk about how the Scramble match sucks so much that Cole and Lawler are still clarifying the goddamned thing, all the while insisting that “it’s really quite simple”. Suuuuuuure it is. Look, we all know Russo got into the planning files. There’s no shame in admitting it. Oooh, another chant for Punk, who is massively over here in Pennsylvania. Either that or they hate JBL’s fucking guts. Or, like me, it’s both. Apparently Cena has hurt his neck — why oh WHY couldn’t it have been Mantits McGee in the ring there getting injured instead? Then he could go back to announcing, which he’s actually good at. Instead of wrestling. Where he sucks.
[Continue...]

Written by Taff on 08-25-2008

Football returned last week, and with it a few suprise results, such as Newcastle grinding out a 0-0 draw at Old Trafford. New boys Hull picked up their first win in the league with a 2-1 win over Fulham, while Stoke went down 3-1 to Bolton. Would the new boys struggle again? Would Chelsea continue to show excellent form? Can Man Utd bounce back from an early season setback? And will a Villa match finish 0-0?

We shall see!

[Continue...]